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Embarrassed: Jerry Jones' Plastic Surgery

Oct 31, 2010

 

 

 

 

 





"His own cheerleaders won't know him"
 
Dallas, TX - According to sources close to the Dallas Cowboys, owner Jerry Jones is so ashamed of his 1-6 Cowboys he has scheduled dramatic new plastic surgery to change his appearance.

"It makes me sick to abandon this face," said Jones, who will also resume using his birth name Jerral. "It cost me plenty. But a man in my position can't afford to look ridiculous. Or be identified.

"I'm going to a plastic surgeon first thing tomorrow morning. "
 
"With the disguise and the new name, the Cowboy cheerleaders wouldn't recognize him," said a source close to the soon-to-be Jerral Jones.
 
Jones, who has had previous cosmetic work done, has a reputation for cost-cutting and abrupt decision-making.
 
"The last doc charged me an arm and a leg," explained the voluble Jones. "I found a new plastic surgeon. This time I'll look completely different. And I'll save big bucks."

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Reader Responses
Nov 2, 2010 12:20 AM
Kimbo
Brooklyn Tex, what the f***?  Call a team of shrinks.
Nov 1, 2010 9:13 AM
Yo
I hope the picture of him in the headline isn't the proposed 'after' face.  Makes him look like Charles DeGaulle.
Nov 1, 2010 9:07 AM
Brooklyn, Texas
Being a Texas guy now I can tell you Jerry Jones shouldn't stop at a face lift he should get a new head. These folks want winners. Whatever happened to trying your best. And if your best ain't good enough: "Wait until next year."
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