|Wednesday, April 23rd, 2014|
Let's Go ... Trumps?
Mar 28th, 2014
New York (eTrueSports)- Reality TV personality Donald Trump is in serious discussions to purchase the financially beleaguered New York Mets, eTrueSports has learned. A source close to Trump denied conversations about changing the team's name to The Trumps. Read more...
Foundation Fiasco Sends Hysterical Dan Snyder To Hospital
Mar 27th, 2014
Washington (eTrueSports) - Sources close to the Washington Redsk*ns say that when owner Dan Snyder learned from press reports that the head of his new "Original Americans Foundation" may have bilked the Bureau of Indian Affairs out of $1 million, the mogul began sobbing so uncontrollably he was rushed to the Psychiatric Institute of Washington. Read more...
Jim Irsay to Star In Fox Reality Show "Sons of Entitlement"
Mar 25th, 2014
NEW YORK (eTrueSports)- FOX is set to unveil a new television series, Sons of Entitlement, starring three colorful characters who imperiously rule over iconic sports teams owned by their fathers. Colts' Irsay, Knicks' Dolan, Mets' Wilpon to co-star. Read more...
Bracketology's Dark Side: Kindergarten Betting Gone Wild
Mar 21st, 2014
TOLEDO, OH (eTrueSports)- The dark side of Bracketology. Administrators at Hadley Lane Elementary School in Toledo reacted forcefully today after discovering that hundreds of kindergarteners were involved in a Skittled-based NCAA men's basketball pool. Read more...
Kids' Groups: No Close-ups of Williams, Krzyzewski
Mar 20th, 2014
NEW YORK (eTrueSports) - With the NCAA men's basketball tournament beginning today, children's advocacy groups are calling on CBS and TNT to no longer show close-ups of the faces of North Carolina and Duke basketball coaches Roy Williams and Mike Krzyzewski during game broadcasts. Read more...
Ukrainian Invasion May Prompt Putin Move to UFC
Mar 14th, 2014
MOSCOW (eTrueSports) - "He's scared to death of the Ukies," a longtime Putin confidante told eTrueSports, claiming a Ukrainian invasion of Russia would prompt Putin to jump to the UFC to fight in the women's bantamweight division. Read more...
Apres Hockey: Palin Calls For Invasion of Canada
Feb 20th, 2014
Alaska - UPDATE: "Now I'm really mad," Sarah Palin said after learning the U.S. men lost to Canada 1-0 in the men's Olympic hockey semi-final on Friday. Following Thursday's 3-2 U.S. overtime loss in women's Olympic hockey, Palin called on Canada to return the Gold Medal or face a military invasion. "Only American goals should count." Read more...
Putin Outrage: Olympic Logo Looks Like Bagels
Feb 5th, 2014
Sochi (eTrueSports) - Russian president Vladimir Putin called today for the immediate replacement of the iconic Olympic games logo, claiming it looks like five interlocking bagels - a bread product associated with Jewish delis and bakeries. Read more...
Papa John's Set To Dump Peyton Manning?
Feb 2nd, 2014
Louisville (eTrueSports) - A source close to bargain pizza purveyor Papa John says the company will dump Peyton Manning as a company spokesman. "Any way you slice it, he's a loser," the source told eTrueSports. Read more...
Christie Shocker: Gov Will Resign To Fight In UFC
Feb 2nd, 2014
Trenton, N.J. (eTrueSports) - A source close to Chris Christie has told eTrueSports that the beleaguered NJ Governor will resign his office to sign a seven-figure deal with the Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC). STORY UPDATE: "Bottleneck" replaces "Bridge Boy" as nom de guerre. Read more...
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