eTrueSports Logo Tuesday, February 9th, 2016
 

eTrueSports Columnists

Frank Coffey
Current Column:
Top 11 Lakers' Excuses
11. Lethargic after listening to the Zen Master's pre-game reading of Allen Ginsburg's "Howl" 10. Whichever Kardashian Lamar married, he misses her like crazy when we're on the road 9. Sometimes when things don't go Kobe's way he tends to pout   ...show all columns
Thomas Dolt
Current Column:
The World Series of Spitting
We've recently discovered a swell new sport that both men and women can enjoy together, Spitting  ...show all columns
Downs MacRury
Current Column:
Tim Duncan's Top 11 All-Time Best Quotes
8. Texas is hot. 7. May I have another bowl of Armadillo soup please? 6. Greg Popovich has a funny name. 5. If you think Ginobili is from Italy, think again.   ...show all columns
Ray Dougela
Current Column:
Golf The Way It Oughta Be
The essence of golf: Hurl clubs. Curse lavishly. Kick stuff. Drink, then drink some more.   ...show all columns
Burke Terry
Current Column:
Baseball?s All-Time Business Name Team
I apologize for including Yan ? I couldn?t help myself. If life were more perfect his name would be spelled Yuan, an up-and-coming financial name if ever there was one, and he?d be our bullpen closer.  ...show all columns
Chris Simmons
Current Column:
The Chris Simmons "Inner-View": Jose Canseco
Clemens ain?t talking. Finally, Roger?s being smart. Luckily for me, though, Jose has never been and never will be confused for a Mensa member.   ...show all columns
Bookie Mom
Current Column:
The N.B.A. ? A League of Corruption Just a Phone Call Away
Wow, there?s lots of chatter out there, about the N.B.A being ?a league in cahoots?. How 'bout this year?s odds of a rumored long-ago dynasty (Rome? Pompeii? No, Chicago!) winning this year?s number one pick ? Oh??. It DID happen?   ...show all columns
  • Mercedes driver who totaled Gov Pat McCrory's car after Super Bowl praised for raising state's spirits after Carolina Super Bowl loss.
  • Papa John's "cheap shitty pizza a disgrace to America," says Al-Jazerra TV responding to criticism from the pie company's spokesman Peyton Manning.
  • Donald J. Trump calls for MMA cage fighting to replace baseball as US's National Pastime. "It's as vulgar and ugly as I am," praised the former reality TV star.
  • Goodyear has offered Chris Christie $1 million for digital naming rights to the NJ governor's stomach. "Blimp them," said Christie.
  • Irate Papa John's exec Peyton Manning denies chain adds HGH to pizzas: "Total garbage. Everyone knows that stuff makes you nauseous."
  • A crowd supporting the Kings' Rajon Rondo was broken up by Sacramento police today. "Neither of 'em had their hearts in it," officer says.
  • In rare public statement Alcoholics Anonymous calls former USC coach Steve Sarkasian a "weasel and phony who wouldn't know a Step from a stoop;" narcissist is first person in U.S. history banned from AA meetings.
  • BREAKING: Trump bars delivery of all Middle Eastern food from NY's Trump Tower. "Today's falafel eater is tomorrow's terrorist," Trump said.
  • After calling liberals "concussion alarmists" Flat Earth Society withdraws speaking invite to ESPN's Danny Kanell. "We can't afford to be embarrassed," said FES spokesman.
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