eTrueSports Logo Thursday, April 17th, 2014
 
Thomas Dolt
Thomas Dolt
Thomas Dolt is the co-author of seven books of humor including two in the Joking Off series. He is also an author of some 47 pounds (hardcover versions) of reference books about history and popular culture (note the distinction between the two) for which he uses a pseudonym to protect his reputation as a real Dolt. He has also written for television and has been a gaming consultant for Microsoft, getting at least some of his money back from smashing all  those PC's.

Jan 22, 2011
The World Series of Spitting
We've recently discovered a swell new sport that both men and women can enjoy together, Spitting

Jun 15, 2009
Kobe Bryant's iPod Playlist
Move over Jennifer Aniston

Oct 16, 2008
Top 11 Things A-Rod and Madonna Can Do Together
Enter Dancing With The Stars (Seems obvious, but you never know)

Jul 20, 2008
I Spit Therefore I Am
The sport of Spitting is not complicated. If you squirt a stream of Red Man chewing tobacco further than anybody else you win. Pretty simple. And pretty cool. By the way, Spittoono is put on each year by the Redneck Performing Arts Association (RPAA), and they deserve kudos all around.

Jul 19, 2008
Top Eleven Things Overheard At The British Open
Anybody have extra SPF 30?

May 7, 2008
Why Kobe Says "I Couldn't Have Done It Without My Teammates"
Now more people will say Jennifer Aniston is LA's most absorbed person.

Apr 16, 2008
Next Week's Headlines
Tiger Woods Discovered To Have An Opinion

Mar 11, 2008
eTrueSports Top Eight Matt Walsh Spygate Videotape Surprises
Gisele Bundchen can?t catch

Nov 23, 2007
Top Ten Reasons To Give Barry Bonds A Break
Places bets for busy Charles Barkley

Oct 12, 2007
I Spit Therefore I Am
We've recently discovered a swell new sport that both men and women can enjoy together, Spitting, whose official season winds up with The Spittoono, the World Series of Spitting, held annually now for some 27 years in Clemson, South Carolina.

Jun 13, 2007
Top Ten Other Barry Bonds' Accomplishments
Let's Give This Guy A Break!

  • Oklahoma center Kendrick Perkins touched the rim late in the 2nd quarter of the Thunder's game against the Pacers on Sunday, eTrueSports has learned.
  • In another example of government-regulation-gone-wild, the FCC has ruled that at least one minute of broadcast time during each hour of Masters broadcasts be reserved for “non-erectile dysfunction” products.
  • "Karma's a bitch and she's got a long memory," a spokesman for the American Buddhist Club told eTrueSports about Tiger Woods' withdrawal from the 2014 Masters.
  • Papa John's Pizza pitchman Jim Nantz has taken the lead in the Annual Worst Actor In A Commercial Award, eTrueSports has learned. "Truly embarrassing," a longtime Madison Ave. executive said, who called the currently airing national spot "as cheap and crappy as the pizza."
  • Tigers' star Miguel Cabrera announced he will use a portion of his $248 million contract extension to purchase Detroit. "Good write-off," said Cabrera.
  • A crowd outside WFAN studios supporting Mike Francesa was dispersed without incident by the NYPD late Friday afternoon. "Neither of them had their hearts in it," a patrolman told eTrueSports.
  • Knicks' owner James Dolan will finance and star in "Spawn of the Dead," described as a "horror film with comedic elements," eTrueSports has learned. The Mets Jeff Wilpon and Yankees' Hank Steinbrenner are reportedly considering co-starring roles.
  • A challenge overturned the Mets' GM Sandy Alderson's 'We're-a-90-victory team' assertion in the first pre-game use of MLB's new replay system. "Delusional and sad," said a source close to Commissioner Bud Selig.
  • Sources close to new (and currently suspended) Auburn coach Bruce Pearl are denying reports that mandatory Candor Deficit Disorder (CDD) treatment is part of Pearl's Auburn contract.
  • Heard any good rumors?
    Email the publisher!